Behind the Scenes — Food Porn Edition

No, not my ongoing interview series on the Public Radio Exchange (here’s the link). No, I mean what goes on during a press tour as it sweeps through San Francisco on its juggernaut of publicity.  Schedules are planned down to the minute, and publicists and studio folk work with a press corps and its foibles with grace and patience, juggling last-minute changes while schmoozing all concerned and never breaking a sweat (the good ones, anyway) even when press or talent refuse to finish on time, though woe to the corps member who makes a habit of that.  For the press, it’s an infantalizing experience, and I mean that in the best possible way. Sit here. Sit there. Warm introductions to the talent. Start talking. Stop talking. Thank you so much for taking part.

It’s lovely.

It’s not the only lovely part. Most of the interview days are in San Francisco’s finest hotels and we in the corps are treated very well there.

My favorite running joke is that I’m not in this for the money (hah) or the fame (double hah). I’m not even in it for the chance to engage in intelligent conversation with talented people whom I admire for many reasons both cerebral and/or hormonal (no hah here).  I’m in it for the free coffee and delectable noshing.  You’d expect some sort of hah, but, seriously, look at this chocolate cookie that, let me assure you, is even better than it looks here, what with its delicate, seductive hint of fleur de sel.

Or this, which is as close to the Platonic ideal of what egg salad and a croissant should be that we mere mortals are likely to encounter on this plane of existence. The Mediterranean salad wrap and the feta on cottage loaf garnished with a strawberry weren’t bad either.

And this is not just a cinnamon roll, it is the apotheosis of what a cinnamon roll should be.

Alas, no picture can do justice to this chocolate-chip bread pudding topped with a blackberry.

But be assured that the caliber of these macarons in an alluring array of pastel colors and divine flavors might actually allow you to experience the transcendent.

The quintessence of what berries should be. I have no idea why it should be so, but each one of these was sweet perfection. The idea of adding sugar was beyond the pale.

Which is not to say that these dazzling culinary concoctions are enough to make me turn out for a press tour. I do, in fact, have a short list of people who will never sit in front of my microphone again, and there are others for whom I would eschew even the homey hospitality of a simple cup of coffee (do NOT quote me on that). But there is no doubt that my heart might beat just a little faster knowing that before chatting about film, there will be a different, and not a lesser, art form awaiting me.